So…..I was peed on the other day….

May 9, 2008

It really wasn’t that big of a deal, in fact it did humble me a bit. Day after day I find myself processing Sudan in my own head…..simply because that is the head I do things in, but what I am really doing…..I am processing Sudan in regards to me.

I’ve written about always being watched, never alone yet often feeling alone , not being able to simply blend in….all very real things and all issues that brought about great insights for me on a personal level and even more so on a spiritual level.

So, why all of the attention? Why do children come running out to say “how are you, how are you” when I go jogging; and the adults either laugh or just give a look of disbelief that someone is running but…..no one is chasing them.

I get it…..they don’t get me. I imagine locals look around and wonder, why are these people here? Sometimes I wonder too. I am beginning to study James with a friend from Dallas. There it was….James 1:27, to look after orphans, and again James 2:14-26, faith without good deeds is dead. Well, OK I thought….orphans and good deeds, that is what I am doing out here.

…then some more was found in James, some of this I didn’t want to be reminded of….taming the tongue (i.e. language, bitterness, etc.), not boasting about tomorrow (i.e. medical school), patience, not acting out of anger, and it ends with a great reminder for prayer…

So….I was peed on, and now a little more tuned in to Sudan. If you are worried, please don’t be, it was only a little bit.

I wonder what was going through the little girl’s mind. I imagine a lot of fear, and that was before the pain of the injection.

…oh…if you know how to give a pain free intramuscular injection, please let me know…seriously…

Many children here do live in the “bush”, and some may have never seen a kawaaja, or only one or two before; most of them probably of the doctor type, and therefore only inflicted pain with finger pricks and other injections.

Now, back to the ol’ malaria shot in the thigh…kids just don’t like it, anywhere. So I finally thought about this from someone else’s perspective……

Now I’m a kid….actually with this particular patient….an 18 month old girl……and I don’t really understand why I ache, hot all over…too hot…and generally not feeling happy. Then I go to a building…..something people keep calling a clinic, I see people who look so differently than anyone I have ever seen before. Their hair is long, straight, different colors, highlights, old highlights with darker roots, split ends….etc…etc….and when they talk, I don’t understand. There are other children around but some of them are crying too, and that scares me. These funny looking people are approaching me, and they have this look that worries me. Then they prick my finger, and now I am bleeding. Now, they are making me drink this liquid; even my mom is holding me down and making me drink it. It tastes sweet, but funny. Now they are holding me down again and………OUCH…..right in my leg………OUCH……..how do I tell them to stop…..I’ll cry…..ok, they aren’t listening to me…..I can’t use my hands, I can’t kick my legs…..well, in my opinion there is only one more thing left…..pee. No one likes it….

…..so she did…..I am not sure if it was a defense mechanism, or she simply lost control.

I do feel that I have been humbled by……it…..that….whatever. I feel that God has used….this experience…..(in all seriousness too) to learn more about why I am here, and now a little more insight into how the Sudanese look at me…..us….and it makes a little more sense. No matter what God has called me to do, it is now clear there will always be something that I will need worked on too. Hopefully next time, I can learn this lesson without the pee.